Archaeology really is a career in ruins.
If you walk into a forest and cut down a tree, but the tree doesn't understand why you cut it down, do you think it's stumped?
Dad died because he couldn't remember his blood type. I will never forget his last words. Be positive.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The p is silent.
What’s the difference between an African elephant and an Indian elephant? About 5000 miles.
If you’re struggling to think of what to get someone for Christmas. Get them a fridge and watch their face light up when they open it.
Why was ten scared of seven? Because seven ate nine.
Two dyslexics walk into a bra.
I dreamed about drowning in an ocean made out of orange soda last night. It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea.
Why can't your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it'd be a foot!